Finally...

So I've finally found the balls to blog. Thanks to reading my cousins blogs, she has inspired me. Maybe it'll help make me feel better about life....if I can ramble about it.

Tonight, I went to the bar to catch up with two of my friends. Of course the alcohol got us talking about all kinds or irrelevant shit. But my irrelevant topic was LOVE. I'm not talking about some High School puppy love kinda shit check the yes or no box if-you-like-me type of "LOVE". I'm talking about the Carrie Bradshaw Sex In The City type of love. As she states in the movie, "I'm looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love." It drives me crazy thinking about this, I also think to myself does it really exist?? My bff, thinks it doesn't. My gbf (guy best friend) thinks it does, although he's never experienced it he believes it exists. I want it to exist, to be real, to have that hope but so far in all my 25 years of living I can't honestly and cleanly say that I've experienced this and neither did my bff and gbf. I once asked the man in my life if he believed in it and he said it only existed in movies, that our lives will never be that fairy tale romance, that a movie is simply a movie and was never based on on something real; that people don't interact with each other in that movie love story deal. Tonight, I asked him again if he believed in it; he said it could exist in a stalkerish kind of way. Great. There goes my hope for it being him right? Lol. But what if that's what I want? Is it something that I'll only be able to dream about? Do I settle for something less than that ridiculous love you'll only see in the movies?

My mind is boggled. Is real love, ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love REAL or purely made up for story telling only to make an imprint in the minds of young girls who grow up to be strong independent woman who question and long for something that is inexistant?

Someone tell me so I can either believe in that kiss that makes one foot pop up or realize it is but a fairytale....